Friday, October 22, 2010
1. Pray about your relationship daily
2. Be a loving, supportive mate
3. Create new ways to say you love him
4. Make his life easier
5. Always make time for your mate
6. Share your true feelings with him
7. Sacrifice at times
8. Build him up, never tear him down
9. Express your love for him daily
10. Correct with kindness
Friday, September 24, 2010
That's right, your on time out mothers. Everyday I believe it's necessary to take at least a 15-30 minutes time out away from babies, teens, husbands, kitchen, laundry room etc.... Spend some much needed time alone to relax and cast your cares on Christ. God said "Come to me all who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest (Matthew 11:28) There are times as a mother when you may feel overwhelmed, over worked, and under helped. Stop! beloved take a time out and just rest in the Lord. You will be a better mother and wife when you take time for "YOU!" I notice when I take my time-outs I'm more patient, I respond better instead of reacting to every situation. There are things that we need that are husband can't give us, nor our children, nor our friends. One of the things is Peace that passes all understanding. Now that peace come from the Father. So, beloved do your self a favor and take a time out.
Friday, February 19, 2010
1 Corinthians 13
1Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal.
2And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing.
3And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.
4Charity suffereth long, and is kind; charity envieth not; charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up,
5Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own, is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil;
6Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth;
7Beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.
8Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away.
9For we know in part, and we prophesy in part.
10But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away.
11When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.
12For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.
13And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Temptation, we all go through it. But there is hope for you if you find yourself continuing to stumble. If your constantly giving in to temptation there is ONE vital mistake that you keep on making. If I would have learned this a long time ago, it probably would have saved me from a lot of emotional hurt and pain.
I Corinthian 10:13 (NIV)
“ No temptation has seized (suddenly or forcefully taken hold of), you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; He WILL NOT let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you will stand up under it.”
The word says that with temptation God will provide a way of escape.(I Corinthians 10:13) If you keep falling for temptation then you are possibly missing the “ESCAPE SIGNS.” If you are not familiar with some of the signs that God gives us for escape. I'll give you some examples.
If a guy ask you, “So, can I come by your place?” ESCAPE SIGN! If you know that you're attracted to this guy and if he comes over something is bound to happen. Here's is your opportunity to run through the door of escape. Let's not try to test the waters and see what could happen if you let him in the house. Say no you can't come by. If you feel like that's too harsh, ask him can you meet him at a restaurant or somewhere public. You're setting yourself up for possible failure if you let him in. Temptation is “Nothin to play with.”
Another example of an opportunity to escape from temptation. Let's say your at a social gathering with your other Christian friends at someone's house. You and your significant other are also there together just mingling and have a good time. If he ask, so can we go in the room in talk in a quiet place? ESCAPE SIGN! The bedroom is a place that you should never go on a date. Save the bedroom visits for marriage. There is nothing in his bedroom that you have not seen already. The bedroom is too secluded, and gives the opportunity to try things that you would less likely do in public. So, in the event that this happens, tell your date no we can't go in the room. But if he wants some type of privacy offer to go outside in the front yard away from everyone else, and talk out there. There is always an alternative for temptation, you just need to find the door of escape that God has provided and run through it.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
1. Do You Nag At Him...Not Talk To Him?
If he's not listening to you there is a reason. What have you been saying the last few times you've talked to him? If you have a habit of nagging please quit now. “A quarrelsome wife is as annoying as constant dripping on a rainy day. (Prov.27:15 New Living Translation) Nagging isn't just fussing, and yelling, it's also categorized by trying to tell a man what to do. Sound familiar? Let me help you.... “Tom! You Need To” or “Tom! I'm So Tired Of” ... then the list begins. This will often cause a wall to build up, which begins to block effective communication between you and your spouse. For most men, the more you TELL THEM what to do, the higher the wall gets and they won't listen. Most men don't like to be bossed around like their some kid, you could start to remind them of their mother. Real men like to lead because that's the position that God gave them.
2. Majority of Your Conversations Are Negative
The word says (to do him Good all the days of Your Life) (ref. Prov.) Beloved, if you constantly remind him of the things his doing wrong in the relationship why would he want to keep engaging in conversations with you? I'm not saying you should never tell a man when he's wrong. What I am saying is that the timing should be right, so you're not just talking to the walls but he's actually listening. Throughout the day encourage your man and tell him some positive things about him.
3. You're Always the VICTIM
This was a problem that I had in my marriage. I was always the victim in every argument.... I was never to blame for anything. Ladies, we can't always be right in every situation. When we are wrong we should admit it, and be woman enough to apologize to our man if we were wrong. “....and you will know the truth and the truth will set you free” (Prov. 8: 32)
4. You Point Out His Weakness...But Don't Offer to Help Him
If your suppose to be his help meet, help him become a better man. A good helpmeet can make a mediocre man appear as if he had a crown on his head, just by helping him succeed. (Prov. 12:4) Beloved, offer to help your mate, remember you have the power to build or tear down your house. (Prov.14:1) The only reason you should ever look down on your husband is when your offering a hand to help him back up.
5. Are You Speaking At The Right Time?
Timing is one of the key factors to effective communication. “There is a time for everything under the sun,” (Ecc. 3:1) Beloved, if you try to start a conversation and he says, “Not right now.” Please listen, he is basically saying this is not the right timing. If you decide to go in anyway and start talking, you will probably be repeating this conversation again because HE IS NOT LISTENING. When he says not right now, beloved don't get offended. One of the characteristics of a Godly women is to be chase- the ability to make wise decisions. (Titus 2:4) Choose to discuss the situation at another time unless it is urgent.
When a man walks through the door from work this is usually bad timing to try and have a meaningful conversation. Usually men want to come home to relaxation after a hard day at work. This would not be the appropriate time to tell him all the bills that are due, or dump information on him about everybody who called for him...etc... Give your man some time to relax so the information he receives can be processed.
I hope you found this information helpful, and if he's not listening remember there is always a reason...
Monday, February 8, 2010
Mr. Right Now can get you into a lot of trouble. Beloved don't rush, take sometime to make friends. Evaluate that man, especially if you date with a purpose in mind. What's the use of dating a man you don't think you could possibly marry. If you desire a long-term relationship it's very important to take some time to get to know the person that's taking interest in you. It's so much you can do without using words. Ladies evaluate the guy that is tryin to holla at you. You don't have to make it obvious that your watching him to see if he is truly the man of God he says he is. The Word says, “Do not merely listen to the Word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says.”
His lifestyle speaks louder than words!
Ladies, be patient. Wait for Mr. Right, if you keep falling for Mr. Right Now you might be bringing some baggage into your future relationship. Guard your heart, don't pour out your heart to just anybody. That's how we wind up hurt. Find a guy, and then pour out everything, your emotions, your love, your money, your time, and then when something goes wrong.... We are ashamed, hurt, and now we feel like we can't trust any man But you can recover from a Mr. Right Now heartbreak.
“Trust in the Lord with all thine heart lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.”Let God be the one who sets the standard for Mr. Right and you will be in safe hands.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
1.Practice submission to God.
The Word says, “Submit yourselves unto your own husbands as unto the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22) For ex: There we're times when I was in the praise team and I was asked to lead a song, and I honestly didn't feel like it. But the Holy Spirit was telling me to. So I decided to listen and obey the Holy Spirit by leading the song. This is a way to practice submission by doing the things Christ tells you to do, even if you don't want to do them.
2.Learn How to Study the Word
Study the Word to become a better believer. Your going to need your strength and wisdom from the Lord during your marriage. There are going to be times when you don't know what to do, but if you know how to study you can get an answer from God, also in prayer. (James 1:5) “ If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.”
3.Learn Your Future Role As A Wife
Learn the characteristics of a wife, and how you can put those characteristics into practice. When I was single I used some of the resources that I had to purchase books about christian relationships.
4.Start Perfecting Some of Your Skills
If you can't cook, that's ok. Just begin learning now. When I was single preparing for a husband I didn't cook that well, so I decided to learn how to read recipes and my sister taught me a lot about cooking. And oh yeah, some women from my former church in Atlanta,Georgia invited me to their house to learn how they do it “Down South.” You don't have to be ashamed beloved if their something you don't know how to do just ask the believers around you.
5.Talk To Women Who Have Godly Relationships
Talk to the married women who are going to give you SCRIPTURE about being a wife NOT their OPINION. I had to learn that the hard way. I took some advice from one of my family members they said, “ Make sure you always do “this” for your husband so he's always looking right..” I took that advice and tried it, needless to say he hated it and I didn't do it again. So beloved take the biblical advice, please learn from me.
Beloved, put a smile on your face. “A merry heart maketh a cheerful countenance....” (Proverbs 15:13) How are you going to attract a happy man if you are always frowning? They may start to think that you are a bitter woman, and avoid you. We look so much better when we smile, not to mention that men are attracted to a woman's smile. Don't believe me? I was doing some research online to find out what attracts men to women, and if I was correct about the *smiling*...
Here's a snipet of one of the articles I came across, written by a man . The article was called, “What Do Men Find Attractive In A Women?”
1.)The SMILE of A Woman
"This is one of the most important traits that most men look for and get attracted to in a woman. The right smile releases all those love hormones in a man and his mind pretty much gets set on that. Most men on visualize a women's smile when they think about them. The smile of a women is like a magnet which can draw the man's attention and keep it there."
At #1 our SMILES. Ladies, we look better when we smile. Practice smiling more often throughout the day. I have an experiment I would like you to try. The next time you leave to go out of the house, if it be going to the grocery store, or the laundry mat, come back to the house and look at your significant other and greet him by sayin hello and then smile. (If you just had an argument with your mate, beloved try this at another time when everything is at peace) Then try to have a conversation and randomly smile in the middle of the conversation. Come back to me, and tell me what happens?
Yelling and getting frustrated because the same thing keeps happening over and over doesn't really do anything but make matters worse. Cast your cares on God because he cares for you.(I Peter 5:7) Pray and intercede and let your request be made known to God, the MAN who has the POWER to change his thinking, and leave it with him. I made many appeals to God about my husband, especially in the beginning of the marriage, and he granted a lot of my prayers. But you may be surprised to find out that my prayers didn't start with CHANGE HIM LORD..... I asked God to change me if it was something in me that caused my husband to react a certain way. You may be thinkin, “Na'll she trippin...” But in fact I had to ask God to show me where I was out of pocket, and to get my heart right so I could pray for my husband. The Word says
“ Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.”(Prov. 14:1) The biblical hebrew meaning of the word plucketh (for this particular scripture) means to pull down, or in pieces, break, destroy. The hebrew word for house means family. We can pull down, break, and destroy our family with our own strength. Ladies, this is important that you understand what's being said. We can ruin our family with our strength so we have to be very careful with what we say and do. This is the importance of asking God to show us where we are in error. Then we should begin to pray for our husbands.
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Topic: Creative Ways to Edify Your Husband ( For Married Women, Single Ladies I Got U Covered It's Coming Soon!!!!!!)
It's important to encourage your husband and esteem him.
1. Remind him of who God created him to be.
Example: “You are a great man of God, and I love how God created you.” Then name off some characteristics of your mate. “You're strong and masculine and love the way you're......”
Be creative ladies. It's o.k. If you write it down, make it sincere from the heart don't be fake or phony. When is the last time you told your husband he is great man of God? Beloved, if it's been a while it's not to late to start now.
2. Flirt with your husband.
Sometimes, just saying sweet things like you look so handsome, and batting my eyes at my husband changes the entire mood: from “stressful week” to “let's have fun.” You know what your husband likes. In the event that you don't just ask him? It's o.k to ask, “Honey do you like when I???????” (CAUTION: THIS IS NOT FOR SINGLE WOMEN!) Wives, be direct with your husband....if he says no, I don't like when you..... Then politely ask him what do you like? Allow him to tell you, and then start to flirt with him in this manner, as long as it does not violate the scriptures!
3. Show public affection.
Holding hands with your husband can be a gentle reminder that I want to stay connected with you, and I want the world to see it.
4. Tell your husband that you support him.
A man hearing from his wife that he is supported goes a long way. Now, beloved don't just say you support him if your not following him. Make up your mind that your going to be his helpmeet, and help meet his needs and support him.
5. Ask him is there any area I can improve as your wife? What!?!??!?
Beloved, this is an important question for your marriage. Listen to what he says, this gives your husband the opportunity to express his true feelings. Make it your goal to change accordingly. If you decide to ask this question to your mate, he may have a list of areas he feels you should improve. Beloved pray before you ask this question so you won't leave the discussion hurt or offended. This is one of those answers where your husband is probably going to be brutally honest. However, I'm not asking you to try this to harm you. If you become an affective listener and try to improve in the areas he mentions, this can ultimately improve your marriage.
Sunday, January 24, 2010
This blog site is for ladies seeking to improve their relationships, and heavenly relationship here on Earth. One of the things that many ladies have told me is "I want to have a serious relationship and I want to get married and settle down.” However, one of the major factors that I keep seeing is ladies (CHASING) after the man. The word says Whoso findeth a wife, findeth a good thing…..(Proverbs 18:22) The key word here is FINDETH. Ladies let him find you, please stop searching and doing extra to try and be seen. The true man of God that you desire is not looking for a lady in her myspace picture with her legs open. Im keepin it REAL. He wants a WOMEN.
Yes he desires you to sensual and sexy but all in the right timing. In the bed of marriage. What a WONDERFUL thing I might add. (Lol) God has put this whole thing in order, and when we do it His way, no man can come between your relationship, because it is established and ordained by God himself. The key point that I want to make is while you’re waiting on Mr. Right, dig in your Word and allow God to show you who you should be as a women of God. Prepare yourself for the man that God has in store for you. Learn the characteristics of a good wife and women of God. Practice submission NOW, before you get that ring. Submission is so much more than saying yes. Are you willing to respect the man that God is going to place in your life by following him and supporting him even if you don’t agree? Don’t ask for a man of God your not willing to follow…… But this is all apart of submission ladies….. See what I mean? Ask God to get your hearts right now. I desire for you to have a Heavenly marriage here on Earth, and if that means given it to you real, SO BE IT…..
God Bless You